Wow...

Well today was a big wow day if you had eyes and looked the tv...what a mess. I don't really know what to say and if you know me, you know I am not often at a loss for words. This is a huge freaking mess. I don't think the "bailout" plan was perfect, but I also don't think it was "sold" to Americans correctly...again our leaders not talking to the American public in a way they can understand. I am not wealthy (I know you are all shocked right now by that announcement)...we have 529 accounts for the kids and Roth IRAs for ourselves, but nothing really in the stock market of great value. I never really check those accounts to be honest...I am too busy checking my savings, checking and credit card accounts. I really didn't see the immediate affect this would have on me until I really looked at my life...right now we own two cars...one is almost 9 years old and one is 5. We live in base housing....but we should be up for a new assignment next summer, which means a move...a house on base isn't always a guarantee or option. So...we will be in need of a possible house and a car by next summer...loans...help from banks...now I see problems. It is scary to think of this in that perspective. I have good credit and we have worked hard to pay off debts and be in a good position to borrow money when the time comes...but will there be money to borrow? It is a scary time to think of my parents...retired and not looking forward to their retirement funds, but living on them. And my kids...one day this mess will be their mess too no matter what plan we choose. I think that America was given a line of wall street bailout that didn't transfer to what it means to everyone...it is a national issue and a global issue...a mess.
On a similar note...got my absentee ballot this week in the mail and mailed Brandon his today...I haven't voted or sent it back in...I wish I could say this was an easy one for me...I am sure and know the right choice...right now I am choosing not the best candidate for all the things I think we need in this country, but rather trying to figure out the lesser of the two evils....
Warning...if you don't want to be offended by my opinions stop reading...I plan to voice it...
I like John McCain. I really do...I think he is a great American, he was a great soldier and I admire a lot of things about him. I am tired however of hearing about his POW status all the time...and about the surge. I know he was a POW...he will always be honored for that...but I need to know what he will do as my president to ensure me a better life, my kids and our country. The surge was great too...but what now...ideas, solutions! And then there is Sarah Palin. Man I tried to like her. Yeah he picked a woman...a woman that is pro life in all instances...something I do not support or agree with...I am not pro abortion...I am pro choice and pro the fact that we all have circumstances we must make decisions and live with those consequences. Even John McCain is more liberal on that stance and I can at least agree with the fact he can support it in cases or rape and incest. She is gun toting Alaska hokey mom...but again...what does that mean she can do for my country and me...I am not sure much other than give Tina Fey great material for Saturday Night Live.
Then there is Obama...okay my conservative friends...stop reading now so you don't disown me...I am saying it...I wanted Clinton...I would have voted for her in a heartbeat and that is a fact. I like her and I am saying it here on my blog, so deal with it. Obama has made some leaps in gaining my support, but I am not fully sold on some things. I do like Joe Biden a lot and that helps...I think it showed good judgement to pick someone like him to stand by him. I think he handled himself well in the debate, not just with answers but his demeanor was easy going and comfortable...he talked to McCain and directed things to him as poor Jim Leher tried to get him and McCain to both do...I agree with Obama on a lot of issues, but several I don't. And with both of them I am not at all in favor of their immigration stance. See this is where you all have me pegged as a crazy liberal, but I am not...I sit on the fence a lot, with one leg on each side and see points I like and don't. I am pro choice, but I support the death penalty...democrat for one, republican the other. I am not on board for the whole immigration reform crap. Sorry. I went to college in Arizona...I lived in Texas for four years and now in southern CA...or shall I say northern Mexico...my son goes to a special ed preschool and has autism, but is in class with an ESL (English as a second language) student. I am tired of going into town and not understanding the vast majority of people that are around me and what they are saying. My grandparents and great grandparents were immigrants...they came to this country and learned English...got jobs, paid for their way through life and didn't "mooch" off the government. When I worked in TX at a domestic violence shelter my eyes were opened to some things...people using the ER for routine things....our ER here in the Antelope Valley is one of the busiest in the US for that reason. It really bothers me...sorry.
So at the end of this...I have not marked a box...I will, but so far, i am not sure which one it will be. The mess our country is in isn't going to be fixed by either of these men taking office in January...we have a lot of work to do as a country and that isn't something one person, no matter how great, can do on their own. It is sad to me to even say that, but it is what I think none the less.
There is my rant...take it for what it is worth or not...I am just not sure what to think about the future of this country tonight...we are in a mess and it is scary and sad...
I am off to bed now...I have seen and heard and said enough...

Long weekend...

Well this weekend we did nothing, and it felt like it.  Long, long, long boring weekend.  I am bored, the kids are bored...long weekend.  But my parents arrive next weekend and I know that we will soon be having fun and busier.  Zach had a rough week and weekend, so that is probably part of it for me.  He had such an awesome week, and then this one wasn't.  It happens.  Hoping for some improvement and some time to hang out with him alone when my mom and dad are here, that might be a big help for both of us.  

Getting things done though...the house feels like a mess and so unprepared for my parents to visit...I hate that.  Without a guest room I feel like I have no space for them since they will be staying in my room and I will be bunking on the sofa bed off the kitchen.  So, it feels very disorganized right now. I did finish Erin's baby scrapbook today...it feels good to have it done...three pages left in Zach's age 3-4 one...I am excited to be done and start the new ones...I do birthday to birthday as my years...so I am not super far behind.  None the less, it is nice to get some things done...

I am always trying to clean out and organize when Brandon leaves...it is nice, but so messy while you are doing it...so now I need to get stuff in place and looking nice for my parents...

Zach got a haircut at the BX yesterday...I am getting more used to mine. I don't hate it...I definitely like it better short and that isn't as much the issue as the style...I had wanted it shorter in the back and longer in the front and got the opposite...it works for now I guess....not a big crisis, just something else that isn't as I thought it would be.  Zach has school tomorrow and hopefully gymnastics if he and Erin can make it there...

Gotta get going and get the kids in the tub and off to bed...Zach needs some good sleep and good start to a new week here.  We both do...

So long Sunday...

photos...

Just wanted to throw on a few photos...
Erin being her usual self, sitting on things!

Her new kitchen set from Nowie and Grandpa...both kids love it...
Super smiles...
Erin at the other Erin's house with the kitties...she loves them.
My new not so great haircut...

A few things...

* First I want to say Happy Anniversary to my parents...I can't wait to see you a week from tomorrow.  All of us are thrilled you are taking time to come to the middle of no where and hang out with us right now...thank you!!!

* Got my hair cut today...First time in a while not sure if I like it...maybe too short, maybe too layered...I have no idea...

* Maybe I am grumpy from 2 weeks of being woken up before 6 AM...I am grumpy tonight.

* Glad my friend April found her cat Snackie...I love Snackie!

* Got some photos from Photoworks today and excited to finish up some scrapbook pages when I have time.  

* Zach was super tired today...took a nap and in bed early...not sure if it is the busy weeks or being back on his Zyrtec...Hopefully nothing more than that.  

* Unsure of the weekend plans.  Invited to a birthday party on Sunday in town, but it is during Erin's nap time and for someone Zach goes to preschool with, but I don't really know...so I might play that one by ear and see how we are feeling and behaving. :)

* IEP went well. We had no changes and all reports were positive about his progress, maturity and abilities.  Academics are above his age, social skills are catching up...he now will join in and initiate play with others but has a hard time when other initiate with him and he isn't interested...not sure how to react I guess.  His behavior is much improved...less meltdowns and tantrums.  Still fidgets a lot and squirmy when asked to do auditory based tasks. He has auditory processing deficit...I think that is what they called it.  So right now we are pushing for Kindergarten in a year and see if he can progress enough in behavior to get there.  His OT (occupational therapy) part will be done on October 17th since she was unable to make the meeting and I am pushing for him to get that service and they say he doesn't need it....

Okay...off to watch tv...then bed...I am pooped!!!!  

Too late...

I will most likely post again tonight, but just wanted to write a quick note this AM....Zach finally took a nap yesterday...thankfully!  He was so overtired and it was showing in his personality and temperament all week.  He had a very good night with Miss Gerri, we stopped and got McDonald's on the way home and we played outside for a long time (thanks to my spotlight).  So it went better than days before.  He still wasn't as in tune as he had been last week, but with Zach this up and down is what we have become used to and I am trying not to get too upset or frustrated.  He is a great little boy and we all have down days.  Erin had a great day....went to the doctor...no issues thankfully.  She had fun, laughed, giggled and was just her sweet self.  Yeah Erin. I removed the ottoman from my living room so she can't climb on it and propel herself from that to other things...helped.  They got their kitchen early for Christmas...love it! Will post photos tonight of that.  I had a friends stop by to chat last night and stayed up way too late for me....so now off to Palmdale this AM...IEP in Boron at 2:30....busy day.  Woken up at 6 by workmen again...I am so irritated.  But I called and it if isn't better by next week I will be calling again!  I have been married to Brandon now too long.  Off to get ready...

Tough Tuesday!

Today wasn't a great day for Zach which translates to not a good day for me...he was just very out of it and not paying attention well, not listening and having a rough day.  Not awful, but not good...got worse tonight at bath time and he just got himself all worked up.  He really needed a nap today, but refused to take one and this is what we get...total nuclear meltdown at night.  Anyhow...I am off to eat my dinner at 8 PM and get to bed early...mommy has a big next few days and I am tired...

Monday, Monday...

Well this will be brief...I am pooped!  Went to the doctor this AM...tests were run, so far so good, but more results to come.  Got Erin her immunizations...had to get MMR and DTAP...Yuck!  She has had a rough day, but her night was better.  Zach had a great day, but his night was rough.  Figures.  He did well at school and gymnastics.  A friend's husband mowed the grass for me tonight, so that was great.  Brandon's best friend here Miles came by to see us before he went home tonight...he and his wife used to live across the street from us and now live about 45 minutes north in Tehachapi.  Great to see him and Zach loves him, so it was a big thrill for Zach to have him here.  He is a great guy, so nice he made that effort for us.  Apparently my daughter redid our answering machine message last week, so my friend Amy drove over to check on us too since the machine didn't have a message, just noise.  Oh Erin.  So, we were well checked on today.  Hopefully the kids will sleep well and have a great day tomorrow.  Going to town with no big plans and that is fine...got my books and time to just sit and unwind...I will take it. I am off to watch a bit of tv and get to bed early in case my kids are up early again...5:30 with Erin this AM was a bit earlier than I like.  

Another weekend down...

Today was a good day...we did nothing and it was great.  We got up and had breakfast...lazy AM with cartoons and playing.  Zach asked to call Grandpa right when he got up...so sweet.  Got out the Aquadoodle that we haven't played with in almost a year I think...that led to an hour of playing...then we headed outside to play. I cleaned the porch, Sally's kennel and the kids toys off while they played.  Zach picked out his outfit and dressed himself...awesome!  We then blew bubbles for a long time.  Always a winner. Finally Erin was done and ready for a nap.  She went down and Zach asked if he could make muffins with me.   We made them together and even got him to eat one.  He chatted with my parents again...second requested call in one day. We then played and hung out until Erin woke up...then played some more and had dinner...bike ride, tubbie and early bed.  Zach was pooped and clearly ready for bed at 7:00, but went down a bit later.  Erin fought me a bit, but was equally as ready.  She has just not been herself, but didn't have a bad day...I see no signs of something being wrong with her, so I am not super concerned...just not my Erin.  Busy week ahead...tomorrow...Zach has school in the AM...I go to the Dr. at 9...Brandon called and made a stink with the flight clinic about some things, so I am now going in there tomorrow even though I feel fine right now...of course I feel good now....so I will take Erin with me...then Zach has gymnastics at 2 and Erin will watch Erin for me so my little one isn't in a stroller for two long stretches of the day and upset with me.  So...should be a busy day, which are good and make our days go by quicker.  It was a super uneventful weekend here, but good. I think my friends have already forgotten we are alone!  I am okay with that really.  The three of us do well together and are pretty content with our routine.  Then we have Zach's IEP on Thursday in Boron...so Erin will watch both kids while I go there, so she will be with little Erin from 8-1 and then here for me to go there...appointment at 2:30.  I have a hair appointment on Friday AM and a sitter for the kids then too...birthday party in town on Sunday.  So all in all lots to do.  And in two weeks my mom and dad are coming...yeah! So we have a lot to be excited about and get ready for.  I got in the mood with some cooler weather this weekend and put out my Fall things...new flag, wreath, decorations and my big find at Target last year on clearance...a grapevine pumpkin with white lights...on my porch and so cute!  I love this time of year and enjoy getting all ready for it.  I planed new flowers and just enjoy the changes...even though we have NO trees now and it never feels like seasons change here in the Mojave except for temperatures...I enjoy it as much as I can.  Off to watch Army Wives and bed...big morning...

Slumber party recap and updates...

Just wanted to share some cute photos tonight from last night and an quick update...
Our Friday slumber party was awesome...Zach and I got a chance to go outside and look at some stars while supervising Sally...I am scared to let her out at night now after the coyote attack. We looked up and saw a million stars...one nice thing about living in no man's land...it was so pretty and he just loved it. We came in and watch a show in my room and then out went the lights, cuddles and talking. He got up and gave Sally a kiss goodnight, she sleeps on the floor on her bed...it was so sweet. All in all great night.
Today Miss Erin had a rough day....huge, massive, awful meltdown this AM. A better afternoon, but not great. She is not acting like her normal self. I am hoping it is nothing big. She is just into and on everything and getting herself in a world of trouble...otherwise she could kill herself climbing on some of the stuff she is onto...so she isn't too happy with me, but I would rather have her mad than hurt...just the start of many years of mother daughter fights I see ahead for us. She is just such a determined and capable little girl for her size and age and tries so hard to copy her brother. Oh my Erin...she is still so cute and sweet even when she is an awful pill all day long...
Zach has had a great week and is doing so well in so many areas...I am beyond thrilled to see him do some things and act like he is...
He was finally able to take his bike helmet off by himself since Brandon left...he didn't want to try forever and then literally when I tried to make him, couldn't get his fingers to grasp it correctly...I made him battle it out one night and after tears and yelling, he did it...now he does it daily with no issues. He has started to play in his room with toys so that he can have alone time with toys he likes and that he doesn't want to share. I told him that I wouldn't tolerate the fighting with Erin over toys all the time, so he was allowed to pick some to take to his room...it has worked out so well...Erin hasn't noticed them missing and he has time alone, mommy has time alone...we all win. He has started to use the phrase, "I don't know". This is new. Before if I asked a question and he didn't know he would get upset. Now, within the last 7-10 days he has said this to me. It is awesome and oh so cute. He is taking charge with Erin a lot...helping do things with and for her...holding her hand without being asked to go places...very attentive. Putting on his own socks and shoes without a battle. Washing his own hair and dumping the water on his head...also washes Erin's. Just so many awesome things. I am so overflowing with pride for him. I know it seems like small potatoes, but he really has struggled with some of these things. The hair washing used to make him scream...one night he did it himself and that was that.
So hoping for a happier Erin tomorrow and more great weather. Finally feeling like Fall here...

Zach from yesterday...
Miss Erin and her thumb...and Boo Boo...
Mommy and Zach on slumber party night....
Huge fun and lots of smiles...

TGIF

Well it is Friday night...time for slumber party with Zach and I am excited. He had a great week. He did so well with school and with things around the house...just a really good week for us. I am so proud of this little guy for all he is doing and how mature he is becoming about some things. He did get a bit upset in the bathtub tonight, but I think he is just so ready for Erin to get to bed and him to have his special night.  I am glad it means so much to him and I have been able to help him in some way.

Met with the behavioral person today...not sure yet what to think about her or how this will all work out. I know that I could use help in some areas, but honestly our worst issues were 6-8 months ago.  I will take what I can get though and not complain a bit.  She was just an odd duck and not sure how educated she is in some areas...but it was one meeting, keeping an open mind.

Erin had another short nap...woken by this ladies loud laughter and Zach bouncing a ball...so she is off to bed in a minute and then we will have our night...

My sweet husband called the flight doctor office today to ask them again why when I asked to see my GYN early for my annual exam due to issues I have been having why I wasn't given a referral...so I have an appointment with the flight doctor Monday.  While he meant well, it wasn't exactly what I wanted.  Oh well.  I will take the help and try to be thankful.  :)  I need to get some things figured out for the holidays with the kids...we have Tricare Prime, so we need referrals to see doctors....if we had standard we couldn't use the base doctors and living in a semi remote place we need that for the kids...if I switch I can't switch back for a year...so much to figure out. I don't want to be heading to the ER every time someone gets sick when we are in NC for the holidays....and we know someone will get sick, it happens.  

Not much else to report...2 weeks from tomorrow and my parents will be here. Yeah.  I am excited to have them here and so is Zach...Erin has no idea, but will love it all the same.  

Off to say good night and snuggle...

Almost the weekend...

Finally some photos! I took some pictures tonight and decided just to post them before I forget, it gets late or something else comes up...so here they are...
We are all doing well and so far things are going okay for us. The behavioral therapist is supposed to meet us tomorrow at 11 AM, so we will see how that goes and if it has been worth the long wait. His IEP is next week and I plan to do some studying and homework to get ready for it...I have all the CA laws and I am ready.
I got a call from my mom today that made me sad...please keep her and my grandmother in your thoughts. Apparently my grandmother wandered away from her assisted living center in San Rafael and was luckily brought back safely. However they have no placed her in the Care Unit where she is no longer in her own room (the room she has been in since moving in there 7-8 years ago). She also has a monitor now that she must wear...that part I actually think is a good idea and if they had put one on her before...she has wandered previously...then this might have been avoided. She is 94...it is sad to think of her being placed somewhere and probably scared. I don't feel like going into more details of the ordeal, but I know my mom is very upset tonight and I wish I could do more for her and my grandmother. So...good thoughts would be much appreciated.
A friend of ours from our TPS class lost her husband last week and I read the obituary today...so very sad...he was in his 30's.
A friend here had a big scare on Monday...their dog was attacked in the back yard by a coyote. We have had coyotes running all over this base....with abandoned houses they are walking in housing areas like it is no big deal. This is the first I heard of something being hurt...the dog is severely injured and might not make it. I am much more careful of having Sally out at night and even let her in during the day when we are not home. I worry so much about the kids too.
Went to town today with Erin since her sitter had plans. We went to the park and met Brandon's commander's wife. It was a nice outing and so nice to hang out with her...she is super nice and has a little one not much older than Erin. We had a nice day in town and it was fun to have my buddy with me. She didn't get more than a 40 minute nap, so it goes to only justify whey I don't take her with me...
No plans for the weekend, so we might head to a park in town Sunday AM and play...otherwise we don't have anything going on and that sounds good to me. Zach has been good all week and done well at school...so unless tomorrow is an utter disaster, we are having our slumber party again. I am actually excited!
Enjoy the photos below....
Erin...one sock, no pants, no diaper...my little mess...
Playing together in Zachary 's room...we had all the toys out it seemed...lots of fun though!
More playing, sharing and fun...
Smiley boy....

The ladies...she is such a goof....love it.
She found two of my purses in my closet and came out with them around her neck...wore them all afternoon...
Strolling with her bags...
Cuties....

post or not to post...

Well I didn't post last night because I was simply tired and just didn't have a ton to say.  I don't have any pictures uploaded on this computer, so I can't share any tonight again...I will try to get on that soon.  

I have really just tried at night to take the time when the kids are in bed to relax and unwind. So, last night I just decided not to post and enjoy my down time.  

Well the past few days have been great here...both kids are doing really well and things here have been good.  Erin seems to be handling things better...but some of her temperament issues are just simply part of her age. She isn't able to communicate her feelings and needs and is getting frustrated with herself and the world around her.  It is something I remember well from when Zachary was this age.  She seems to be handling things better than she was last week.  She is back to her more fun and sweet self.  Lots of laughing now and enjoying her brother a lot. :)

Zachary is doing really well. He had another great day at school.  Apparently they had a lot of changes today and he handled them all without a single whine or meltdown.  The teacher was thrilled and so was I.  He had  a good night with Miss Gerri too.  A really good night actually. I was so proud of him.  He is doing so well right now with so many things and I am so proud of him.  We have plans for another slumber party this Friday night and he is all excited about....and honestly....so am I.  It is nice to have that time with him.  I know it makes him feel special and he needs and deserves that right now. Both kids do.  He really has stepped up and been so helpful and good the last few weeks. I think we have made some great changes and we are all benefiting from them.  

Spoken to Brandon a few times and he is doing well....although he isn't the best phone communicator, so we usually talk about the kids and keep the conversations based on information sharing...

I am so surprised about the Wall Street News...one day I am glad to not have money to have invested in there.  So many scary things going on though and the election is just around the corner.  I am not sure either man has the right ideas or can begin to fix the magnatiude of problems we have...

Okay...off to tv time and resting...

What to say...

Well I really need to get some photos up here to post, but didn't take a ton over the past few days, so not any great ones to use.
Zach had school this AM and did fine with the new times for things. It will definitely make our nights earlier so we can be up early for school, but I am okay with that. Tonight both were in bed before 8...I knew Zach was tired and ready. He had gymnastics today also...a treat that Erin came to watch my Erin for me. Two ladies I know here were both there with their kids. One I used to be close to and now we are just polite with one another...the other I have known since I moved here and we see each other from time to time and hang out with the kids...either way it was nice to see them there and hopefully they will continue to go.
Erin's diaper rash is still there, now just spots...I will give it one more day and then call the Dr and have her go in...
Erin ate a great dinner tonight and Zach ate a great one last night...always one or the other.
Brandon called and is doing well...sounded tired, but okay.
Speaking of tired I am pooped. I didn't sleep well last night since my insane dog that ate six cupcakes off the counter woke me up at 2 AM.
I am off to finish the household chores and hit they hay early...photos and more commentary tomorrow...

Sunday...

Not much to report today...we had a pretty easy day. Hung out here most of the day.  Erin took a nice long nap and Zach and I played board games while she slept. She needed the rest I think.  She has been a wild woman lately...fussy, temperamental, and she is into and on everything. Gave miss Sally a bath...she needed one! Hit the commissary around 3 both kids did well and I was actually able to get the items on my list and use coupons.  WOW.  Got home and had a normal (not microwaved) dinner for once.  Zach did really well with his dinner tonight and I am okay with the fact that he was bribed with a trip to the park to do so.  Erin...well she did try what was on her plate.  She had a great lunch, so I won't argue.   Met my friend Kristie at the park...her oldest was diagnosed with Autism as well.  We let the kids play for a while and then headed home around 7....baths and bed to follow.  I am probably going to hit the hay soon myself.  I am pooped.  I have a bunch to ebay and need to get to that, but not in the mood tonight for it.  I am hoping Zach can do gymnastics tomorrow and Erin cooperates too.  His new van schedule is earlier than normal...he used to get picked up at 8:30 and now it will be 7:55.  UGH!  I am not sure how any of us will do with that, but we will try.  It stinks because he now will be home earlier too...I was hoping they were extended the class times, but no such luck for the little guy.  So...we all must go to bed earlier now...which is fine by me. :)  Night night...

Clean makes me happy...

Well we had a good Saturday...very good in fact.  I am feeling a million times better and so thankful.  I had a wonderful night with Zachary and I can say my idea of a slumber party was just what we both needed.  Some alone time is always something that seems to pep him up and help us take that time to not get so frustrated with each other.  We can butt heads with the best of them, but Zach is just amazing and I adore him...so when I see him lose his way it is nice to help him back.  This morning we had pancakes and cartoon time...then Erin was having a rough AM...napped super early and only for a short time...so after she got up my day was a mess...I decided to clean like a mad woman...it was great.  The kids stayed busy with things and really let me clean without bugging me....amazing I know.  I was able to get so much done and Zach really helped entertain Erin a lot. I dusted, vacuumed, moped, did laundry, cleaned sheets, cleaned bathrooms, the kitchen...you name it.  Erin (that watches Erin) called and we made plans to get together at 2...she and her husband came by and we surprised Zach with a trip to go bowling at the bowling alley on base. This is typically a Daddy and Zach activity, so a big treat to go with me. He was so excited he couldn't stop smiling and dancing around.  It was great.  Erin lasted one game and came home with Erin...she has just been fussy all day...teething,a diaper rash and missing daddy are all playing a part of it.  Zach was good and had so much fun.  We got home and decided to forgo a dinner invite since Erin was fussy and I wasn't in the mood to chase them around instead of eating.  Brandon actually called when we would have been at dinner, so it was perfect we didn't go.  

So, I have a super clean house, spoke to Brandon again and my kids had a fun day...well more Zach than Erin, but I will take it....They both are loving the sand box and time playing together.  So cute to see them really bonding and starting to play with each other.  Zach is very happy to have a friend in Erin now and has been a huge help to me lately.  I am so proud of both of them....

So off to get them in bed early and mommy some me time...yeah!  

Reconnecting

Well I didn't post last night because I had a slumber party with Zachary...we had a rough few days and I decided he needed some one on one time. He was so excited. I can't do a lot of one on one things that we would normally do with him, so this was the best idea I had while having him and Erin at home and Erin already in her bed. We watched some tv snuggled in my bed and then cuddled up and went to sleep. It was great. :) I didn't sleep my best, but I sure enjoyed having my pal there.
I had a good day yesterday....nothing bad or awful occurred, so that to me is a success. Still having tantrums from Erin that are out of character...she is cutting teeth I think, so I am sure that is part of it, but I also think she is just dealing with all of this in her own way...not having words yet makes her at a loss to tell me about how this feels. I hate to see her look for Brandon and call his name...it is so sad. She is such a sweet little girl and often gets dragged around to do things for Zachary...so I am trying to make both of them happy as best I can...never simple.
I had a great surprise yesterday....I spoke to an old friend! Again, it is due to the wonderful world of facebook.
A little history....
When I got to Arizona in 1995 I knew no one. I lived on floor 7 of Arizona Sonora Dorm...my roommate and I weren't friends, just roommates...she moved out at Christmas to go home. Anyhow...night 2 or 3 I ran into a pretty blond in the bathroom brushing her teeth. She seemed so shy and nervous and normal...I was looking for that. I knew no one when I arrived there for orientation and it was liberating and scary. Her name was Cady. She was from Denver. She knew no one also. We became fast friends and had a really good friendship. We also were friends with other girls on the floor...soon a group of five of us hung out all the time and were very close. By the end of my freshman year I was close with another girl I had met during orientation and a new friend I had met second semester. As much as I loved my dorm friends, I wasn't interested in living with them and they all wanted to get a house together. So they did and I lived with Sarah...My year with Sarah was awful and our friendship came to a crashing end...I became even closer with my friend Kelly and we both commiserated about roommate issues. Cady left for Spain her junior year...before she left we hadn't spent as much time together and when she got back nothing was the same. A lot happened while she was gone and as it always is with girls, people talk. One person in the group took it upon themselves to share with her things to test out the waters...they had a secret to hide but chose to tell her that I had spent time with a guy she liked while she was gone...oh the drama...in truth, nothing happened that I couldn't have told Cady about, but I know Cady...once it was shared by the other girl she then lost her trust in me...and there was little at that point I could or wanted to do to fix it. I was sick of the group dynamics and out of all of them, Cady was the only one I was really close to...the saying friends for a season...well that is what it was with everyone else. So we lost touch, saw each other out once or twice, but we weren't the same and neither of us tried to fix it...we both met the men that are now our husbands in that next year...we both made good friends at school and we both found new paths in life...
Yesterday we spoke on the phone for the first time in probably nine years or more. It was great. Easy, fun, and normal. We talked about everything....we were us. She knows me well and I think I know her pretty well too...we both had similar issues with the group of girls we hung out with...we met them and just didn't move on to people we really had things in common with soon enough. When we did things got better for us, but we learned those friendships weren't real, sincere or even enjoyable at some points. Convenience maybe. I think if we hadn't had our friendship damaged in the process we would still have remained close through it all...but things happened and we can't change it. Now we can start fresh, get to know each other again and fill each other in on our lives. She is a a beautiful person and I am glad that we can be friends again.
So...that was the highlight of my day for sure...
I am off to give hugs and kisses to my babies and enjoy our day...

photos...

No sugar coating...this week was not the best. I didn't feel well and that definitely affected more than me. The kids I think are finally starting to be sad and wonder about daddy. Erin is a lot more fussy, temper issues flaring up and always needs to be where Zach and I are and in the mix. I expected this, but it is a bit exhausting and frustrating too...Zach is starting to act up a little. Today and yesterday he had some testing moments and we both got upset with each other. Never fun, but it happens and we move on and learn. He has asked the past few days about when daddy will be home and it breaks my heart...he knows if you ask him it is 4 months, but he has no actual idea of what that means. All in all we are doing okay...I think this week has been a reality check for me and the kids and hopefully we will get back into a positive groove next week and things will get easier for all of us.
Here are some cute photos of the kids from yesterday and today...
I love this one of Erin...her smile is priceless and says so much about her beautiful spirit.
Big smiles give when I asked him to smile for Daddy...
The attempt to give her a hair style....she pulled them out in record time...so much for that.
The new sand box...it is a big hit. Thank you Christina for the idea, the kids thank you too!!! They were super messy, but had a blast!

Ready for bed...

Well today was a long and rough one for me...not sure if just a bunch of things all added up, but it wasn't my best.
I don't feel 100% yet and not sure to call back or wait, or what. I am hoping in the AM I will have some perspective. I felt really good in the morning and then I started to have more cramping tonight and just not feeling right...so there is a lot that could be going on and I will see how I feel tomorrow...I can always try to see if they can get me in Friday to be safe...
Erin has a nasty diaper rash that came on last night and was still nasty today...not fun for her or me. She took her nap at 9:30 instead of 11:30 and refused to take a second nap later...oh the fun.
Zach had an okay day. He came home from school and told me bits and pieces that didn't make sense until I talked to his teacher later...his speech teacher was sick...he lost his sticker on the playground...he worked on the letter b with beans...he apparently had a good day.
With me he was all over the place...not listening, being just very off. He had gymnastics at 2, but with Erin's butt so red, I hated to sit her in a stroller for an hour and I knew she was tired and a bit fussy...he wasn't listening well and I asked him for a nap since he had speech in town tonight...he threw a pretty impressive fit and we had blow out...always fun. Good thing the behavioral therapist called this AM and we are meeting her the 18th...I think she can just come and see me and we will be okay with that. :) Since he wouldn't nap I told him no gymnastics...he told me okay, no gymnastics and asked to play with his trains. So...in the end it worked itself out. He had a good night with Miss Gerri and was in a good mood with her and me...came home and Erin stayed with us until 8 tonight to help me with baths and just hang out...which was nice since I don't feel super and the kids love her. I appreciated her doing that for me and really feel so thankful she came into our lives when she did...we are blessed!
I am off to bed now...snuggle up with a general hospital episode and then sleep. I am going to take some books to town tomorrow and just try to relax while there...no walking for me this week...
I will post photos tomorrow for sure of the kids this week....

Deep Breaths do help...

Okay so today was still pretty darn uncomfortable...won't go into details, just leave at that...hoping this is the worst and tomorrow I will be a happier person.
Was in town with Zach while he did his preschool thing and did some shopping for us for the week...at least I got it all done and can just go on Thursday and enjoy the day...if I feel well I can walk at the park and take my book, find a spot to read...a pedicure chair sounds perfect!!!! All my running around today should keep us stocked up the rest of the week...so that is good.
Erin and Zach had good days, but you could tell Zach was irritated with me that I wasn't more into playing and having fun...but we all have our days and it wasn't mine.
I didn't start a new book last night, I chose to watch my shows I had recorded...nice to veg and just enjoy my tv time. I do have to rethink what I watch at night though....watched Army Wives and it had a stalker story line...so not the best when my husband is gone...I locked and relocked the house five times and was up all night hearing sounds...oh well.
I have a ton of things I want and need to ebay from the kids clothes last fall...I need to hop on that and get the closets cleaned out too. Always a fun time for me! I am not sure which book to start next...I have two set out and I am torn...I will have to see what calls to me later...
Zach rode his scooter to the mailbox again tonight...he is getting quite good at it too...I am impressed. Erin as always has to be an overachiever and shock me...tonight I was in the backyard with them, Brandon called and we were chatting. I sat down on the swing for a minute to watch Zach play on the swing set and Erin was walking around. Next thing I know I am smiling at Erin, but she is up at the top of swing set...she had climbed up the ladder all by herself. I screamed several profanities in the phone, poor Brandon, and did a super woman leap to get to her. All the while she is full of smiles and has no clue that she took at least seven years off my life. She is 14 months old! Seriously! Zach thought it was great...so did Erin...mommy is going to retire in January to an island for a while...
Week one down and I am hoping I am not out...off to get the kids to bed and me some cereal...yes the deployment diet it is...no comments mom, I have had a day...I love you.

Monday...not so great, not so bad...

Today wasn't awful, but it wasn't great. I have been fighting the reality all weekend that my antibiotics I took for my stupid bumps to be removed gave me a yeast infection...no fighting it today...second one in 2 months...sorry to share, but good insight to why my day is not so great...Had to fight with flight medicine to get an appointment...just annoying as heck to argue with those people. I am pretty sure they convinced me today why I want to go on Tricare Standard ASAP so I can see real doctors.
Met with the behavioral case worker today for Zach...nice man...will have therapist come to evaluate him soon and assess what can be done...not sure what they can do at school, jurisdiction issues, so he is coming to the IEP meeting at the end of the month with me...Yeah. Will be nice to not be alone and to have another person fighting for Zach's best interest...I am hoping it will help. I didn't sign his OT IEP...(occupational therapy part of his individualized education plan...sorry so many accronyms and it isn't military talk!) I want them to prove he doesn't need or offer me help with his grasping issues. Mommy is not taking no for an answer!
Gymnastics was fun today and Erin did okay in the stroller until the last 10 minutes and then was miserable...I hate to hear her scream and be upset and we were almost done. But it is only 50 minutes, I brought snacks and toys...hopefully we can just make it do able for a while...
Finished the book I was reading...My Sister's Keeper...loved it! I am enjoying my reading fix right now and excited to head to bed and start something new...
Not much else to report....I am off to pack lunch, lay out clothes and get in bed...night night!

Quick one tonight!

Today went well...we had a low key AM again...Zach watched TV and hung out in his jammies forever...played on the computer, just enjoyed being home. Erin went down for a nap and I let her sleep until about 1:40, then got her up and headed to Rosamond. It is about 25 minutes from the house, the town just outside the west gate of the base. It is a small town with not much there, but we have friends that moved there last winter...they have a son one year younger than Zach, Jack. And their youngest was due on the same day as Erin, but Erin was born via c-section 10 days earlier. They knew us in Abilene and the guys are good friends...so I was happy to get to go hang out for a bit. We stayed about two hours...Erin and Sam both suffered minor injuries from being the little ones stuck in the wrong place at the wrong time. :) Zach had a blast and as always asked to go back soon...he is getting to be so social...loves the times we have play dates and super interested in seeing his friends. Tonight we did our usual walk to the mail box and around the neighborhood....I mailed things so we still had a reason to go...Zach asked to ride his scooter tonight. I said yes and was worried he wouldn't make it far...he did the whole neighborhood on it...he is getting so big. He and Erin both had a good day and night and are being so good about so many things...Erin is having a not wanting to sleep night, I think she is cutting some new teeth...the drool is everywhere.
All of us had a nice treat today...we got home and I got online to check my email...noticed Brandon on the facebook site...he then called me using Skype...we got to use the webcams and chat with both kids up and around. His schedule at work is 2-12 right now, so it was 4 Am there and he was up...so it worked out for us. We didn't talk super long, his computer was about to run out of batteries...but we had some time to talk and see each other and that was awesome. Erin was glued to the computer and so excited. Zach smiled and laughed, gave him high fives, hugs and kisses. It was super to see them both get so excited about it...even Sally came in the room and got some face time.
All in all the weekend went really well. We were lucky to have great friends step and offer to hang out with us...honestly the hour or two out of the house made the difference for us and was great. Tomorrow we have school, gymnastics and I think the behavioral case worker is stopping by to meet me. Ironically most of Zach's issues we had such concerns about a few months ago are under control right now and we have worked hard to do things at home to help him. I still hear the same complaints at school that he figits and squirms, but not as much as I was last spring and over the summer...I am also not hearing about him throwing fits there...so we will see what I can get out of this...I refused to sign his IEP from the school...after much thought I felt like that the results in that one area were bad enough that they need to justify better to me why they feel he doesn't need services. I worked with him on a basic skills board this weekend and while he can't do much of it with ease, he was able to try on some of them and let me help him so he will be more willing to work on it more with me...
I better go try to get my crazy daughter to bed now...she is a silly goose!!!

It is all them...

I wish I could take more credit for these first couple of days going well, but my kids are awesome. It isn't me, it is all them. They are sweet, smart, loving, kind, wonderful kids. I am so proud of both of them.
Today we hung out and had a nice relaxing AM...cinnamon rolls and cartoons. We rode up to the park by the clinic on base around 11, meeting a friend and her kids there. She ran late and I started to worry she wouldn't show...she has three and the youngest is only about 2 months old if that...so it was good I hadn't told Zach...they arrived and he was thrilled to see them and his friend Luke he hasn't played with since before the baby was born. He and Luke usually don't play too well together, so having them at the park was good, no one's house and stuff to fight over. They did awesome. They talked and played and were actually the same height even though Luke is one year older. Zach kept up with him and I heard no whining, screaming or fighting. Yippee! They both spent the later part of the time chasing their respective siblings around which was hysterical. Both were making sure Erin and Simon didn't run off into the street or get on big play ground stuff. It was cute to watch them be little parents. I was happy to have some adult time too.
I did find out that a family we have known here for the last 3 years has twins only one month older than Zach...they both have Autism...I knew they saw the same therapist as Zach, but didn't know of a diagnosis...Anyhow...they mom apparently packed them up today and moved back to TX where she has family because she felt the services were so bad here. I know from experience that the services aren't great and we have struggled to get what we do have. I haul him into town three days a week for things...nothing is simple, but it is doable...I guess I am surprised and a bit happy...to know what we have done and with the limitations we have that we have gotten so much success from Zachary and seen huge changes in one year. No, he is not all better. He isn't "recovered" as Jenny McCarthy calls her son (don't' start me on that soap box). He has issues that we deal with every single day and will for a while. But, he is better. He is progressing not regressing. He is showing tons of interest in independence. I hear, " I do it all by myself", all day long now. He is able to control his outbursts a lot better than even a few weeks ago. I am shocked at how well he is handling and understand Brandon being gone. He is just amazing to me...Again, it is all him...
Erin is a pistol...she is all about copying her brother and being right there to follow his actions...she is quick, she is determined and so darn cute. She is showing her temper and getting mighty mad at me when I tell her no. Dramatics is a girl trait for sure. I know she misses her daddy and all the one on one time that he gives and allows me to give. But she has been winning her brother over the past few days and he is actually warming up to the idea of her being a buddy and someone he doesn't have to run from all the time. Some toys he still doesn't want to share, but he is doing a lot better and actually spent time tonight playing and tickling her in his room. She of course loved every single second of it!!!
Below are more photos. I am hoping between this and facebook Brandon can catch some photos of the kids, so I am posting more than normal.

Erin proving getting dirty isn't a boy thing...
My angels...she wants to make sure I see this moment...
He lead her around the whole park like this today...

Watching daddy tonight with Nilla wafers...life is good.
Erin and her hat...she is so into hats right now....she pulls them out of her drawer and wants them put on her head...

Oh that face...my handsome boy...
Erin is off to explore the park...she seems so tiny here!!!
She is bound and determined to follow her brother no matter where he goes...and she does most of the time!!!

A simple phone call...

I know for my fellow AF wives you will get this...there is something so helpless about knowing that you can't contact your spouse...the fact that they are out there in the world, you don't know where and you have no idea when you will hear from them. The phrase no news is good news helps in this case. That is one thing I hate...I hate the not knowing. The just in case of an emergency and I need to call you number that I promise I won't use, but makes me feel so much better just having it...I hate that. So today when Brandon called before 10 just to say he finally got to Al Udied, I was thrilled. We talked for a bit mostly just about the kids reactions to things and how they were. He was exhausted and had no idea how we would talk again since he hadn't been told much, just shown his room. So, I will wait for the next call and more news, but at least he is there...that was a good start to the day I tell you....Zach had a good day at school...always nice to hear and have him come home happy. We spent some time today working on his writing and pencil grasp. I got his OT assessment from the teacher today and read it myself...while his scores in some areas were off the charts...literally he scored at an 8 year old level for visual perception...his grasping was a 15 month level. Yes, I reread it too...that is the 1% range...that is Erin's skill level...that too me signals a child that could use some OT help...yet, they don't give him services...why??? So, I am going to follow my gut and not sign the IEP and request that he gets services based on the one area he is struggling in...to me that is a big struggle! The rest of the day went well I ventured to the BX before 4 to get Zach a hair cut. I assumed (wrong) that it wouldn't be too busy and a good time to go...UGH. We waited for over 30 minutes...Erin in a stroller, Zach in my lap crying. Not hysterical, not pitching a fit, but a controlled sob....I don't want my hair cut, I come back tomorrow. Finally the lady that cuts his hair asked another man if we could go ahead...he gave me a dirty look and marched passed while throwing his number at me...friendly man. SO, Zach hoped up in the seat, said Hi to Julia and told her, "I get haircut today." Oh Zachary...at least I held out and waited...I didn't give in and leave because I knew I would never win that battle again and get him back in there...and he trusted me and stayed with me...it was good. Tonight we did the bike ride to get the mail and around the neighborhood...we then had outside play and tubbie time...Zach washed Erin...it was super cute and she was so happy to have the attention she could have cared that he dumped cup after cup of water on her head. Then he asked if he could watch Daddy read again...so they held hands and walked to the living room. I tell you I wanted to cry and was upset my camera was across the house. They watched and both smiled a lot. Erin went to bed first again so I could have Zach time...he asked me to lay down with him and cuddle...I usually say no, not to start any habits, but told him okay...I asked if he enjoyed his movie and he told me yes and before I knew it he was asleep...I just laid there and listened to him breath...oh those moments are priceless and I am so thankful every time I capture one...
So, it was a good day again...a few bumps here and there, but we are hanging in there and doing well. I have lunch plans both days this weekend and I am happy with that actually...tomorrow will be at the park at 11...so close to Erin's nap time, but a good time and chance to get out of the house...Then Sunday lunch at 2 at a friends house off base...so that will be nice for all of us. Then Monday will be here and the week begins again with fun stuff and busy days. Zach was exhausted tonight and most of the day, so some down time this weekend will do us all good.
I am off to read some more of my book and get into my jammies early...
Again I want to say thank you to everyone for being so awesome. I know so many of you have done this and get it and others are being super about understanding and supporting me along the way. I love that I have such great friends and an awesome family.
Here are a few photos from the day...Be ware I will be posting more photos so Brandon can log on eventually and see the kids on here too...
Sweet Erin...
Zach after his hair cut...he wasn't in a picture mood and I told him to suck it up for me...this is what I got....
Erin in her goofy blue glasses from the pretend doctor kit...she loves these things and giggles up a storm when I put them on here....click on the photo to make it bigger, he expression is too cute!

Using his whistle to make the Thomas train toy go...both Sally and Erin hate this toy and the damn whistle...
I asked them to share the bubble care tonight...it was a huge instigator of both their melt downs last night...this is what I got...wonderful moment as a mom!!!!
Movie time with Daddy again....so sweet to see them watching with smiles...
Sweet face...

Another day behind us...

Today was Preschool in Palmdale for Zach and Erin got to stay home and play with her Erin...she apparently had a great day and was giggly and fun, but also did something to Erin that is new...bite. Oh my kids! When I got home she was napping and when she woke up wasn't as giggly with me as described above...she was pretty fussy and actually threw a few small tantrums...these have been starting over the past few weeks...learning from Zachary I am sure. I am hopeful she was tired and possibly getting a new tooth, since this is super out of her character...notice the second picture below of her wailing at me...she tries so hard to do things she is not big enough to do and has been getting very upset when told no. Oh the joy...
Zach had an okay day...not as great as yesterday, but not a bad day. He seemed tired on the ride back from school and didn't eat well at all today. He wouldn't take a nap and whined a lot later in the day about some things, but nothing too bad. We had one issue tonight where he was sent to his room, but all in all he handled it okay. He did do an amazing job on his homework from speech school...I was so proud of him. We sat at the table and worked on it together, he was so excited about it too...very cute. One of Erin's moments of being mad at me came when her brother and I were at the table without her...oh my Erin...
We had a good bath time and after I gave the kids a treat...I knew Erin had a rough day and was crabby and Zach had a few moments of just being upset...I thought it would be a good way to break them into the daddy time here...I got Zach's calender out and he marked the days off for yesterday and today with his marker...then we sat down and I turned on the DVD Brandon made them of him reading books...Erin giggled and walked up to the TV to see it closer, cute and expected. Zachary sat in silence with the biggest, sweetest smile on his face. He was so happy. He took my hand and squeezed it tight and just watched. I put Erin down first and took some time to lay down with Zach in his room. We talked and cuddled and it was great. He seemed happy and a bit relieved to have his "daddy time". I am glad we have that for them...
So tomorrow starts my long weekend of yuck...He is out of school at 11...I had plans with someone for a play date, but it fell through since her son is sick...no sick kids for me yet please! I have dinner plans for Sunday....I think I will get Zach's hair cut at the BX Saturday and maybe run to town to a park on Sunday AM...who knows...just hoping to keep us all busy...seems to make us happier. :)
So enjoy the few photos below...for those of you curious, this is my last communication with Brandon, a text from his phone to my email this AM...
I'm just leaving Rockford IL and going to Iceland, Budapest and then to Al Udied. I'll call as soon as I can I love you XOXOXO
No news is good news, so I am hoping to hear from him tomorrow...

Daddy and Zach the night before he left...
My unhappy daughter...oh Erin!!!

Their first glimpse of Daddy on the DVD...oh those faces!

125 to Go...

Well the day I was dreading came and is almost over...sigh...
We had a nice night with the kids...Brandon snuggled with Zach and poor Zach fell asleep on him. I barely slept at all...too much on my mind. The morning came way too soon and I knew it was going to happen fast. We got up, fed the kids, got Zach dressed and ready and the van was there right on time. Brandon walked him and told him goodbye...he reminded him gently he wouldn't be there when he got home. It broke my heart. Then it was time for Brandon to get going...good bye to Erin and then me...I usually try not to cry in front of him. I am not sure why, but I always wanted to let him leave thinking I was okay and together, not a total mess of emotions...today I wept. I didn't cry, I wept. It was hard...
Poor Brandon had to rent a car, drive it to LA, get on a flight there to Sacramento, drive from there to Travis AFB and has been waiting since for his flight...so long day for him too and I am sure he has had a heavy heart too...
However...as it always happens around here...Zachary surprises the heck out of me and does so when I need it the most. Erin had an okay day, but seemed to be a bit more vocal than usual about things. Zach had an amazing day...just what I needed to remind me of how far we have come, why I stayed, what we can do if we are patient and calm and make changes that he can understand...how smart and resilient he can be if I give him the chance...It was good...
He had a good day at school and came home all smiles. I gave him some down time to watch tv and unwind and then we headed to the post office to mail Brandon a package and some ebay stuff...then the thrift store and home...he handled it well even though he had wanted to stay and watch tv. Came back and he watched some tv, ate lunch and hung out with me while Erin napped. Then before 2 I had a surprise for him. Erin came by to watch little Erin and I took him to the youth center on base for gymnastics. They have a kindertot class for 3-5 year olds. I wasn't sure how he would do or if he would like it, much less be able to follow the instructions and do the skills. He liked watching it on the Olympics, so I thought he would like it. He LOVED it. I told the coach he has Autism up front, so there was a clear idea that he had some things working against him. But I told him, my son can function in a normal preschool class with his age peers, please treat him the same as the other kids and see if he can do it. If he can't or if he has a hard time and distracts from the class, we won't come back...he did awesome. He listened, followed instructions and had a blast. We are signed up M/W for the month. Hopefully I can get help for Erin and if not she will have to tag along in her stroller.
Then we got back home and I had a message from his teacher...she wanted to discuss his IEP that was held today without me present. It was for his OT (occupational therapy). Apparently the assessment showed he didn't qualify. He tested on a 4-8 year old level on most skills except one that he tested on a 3.9 year old level....that is the one that encompasses his pencil grip and grasping of things...I don't have the paper yet, so no specific jargon. She was worried I would be upset that wouldn't give him OT since he didn't qualify, I was thrilled. That means he is only behind in one skill area and not by too much...this is huge and so exciting. Go Zach!
A friend of mine that I have known since I got here...our kids went to Brenda's together...she called to see if we wanted to get out of the house, she knows Brandon left today...I offered her to come over here and she did...I love friends like that and I am glad she came by...she is great and as always, moving next month. I know, I know...she has three boys, one is a newborn...so the kids had fun and played...Zach went up to her older boys and asked them if they wanted drinks...he then got them water in cups...so cute. He just had an awesome day.
We changed the nightly routine and now we do bike ride after dinner and no park, just backyard play time...he handled that without one single complaint...he whined about the tub, but that is normal and expected. Went off to bed with no issues...he told me he missed daddy and it reminded me again of how long 125 days really is...
I am so proud of Zachary for being so brave and tough. Today wasn't as hard as it could have been if I had time to sit around and feel sorry for myself...I got up and got busy and that was the best thing I could have done.
I do have to say that I couldn't have handled this as well without the love and support of my amazing family and friends. My parents and sister both spoke to me this AM and all day I have had an influx of emails from friends that have put a smile on my face and helped me know that even though most of you are far away, you still love me, support me and are there for me. (Any of you up for a visit to the desert, give me a call!!!!).
Thank you...
Most of all...to Brandon...I know it wasn't easy for him to leave this time. Other times he has the support of his squadron to go with him to do a job he is trained to do...this one has been a bit harder for him and I know he will miss us all terribly. He is an amazing person and I am so lucky and proud to be his wife right now...