Important info...

I read this blog (See in my list of blogs I read, Diary of a Mom) and love it. I was especially touched by the topic today...

http://adiaryofamom.wordpress.com/2010/09/18/act-today/

Not only do we have the deployments to deal with, but the moving and the lack of good locations. We move often and most kids on the spectrum tend to not be good with changes. The uprooting is hard for them, hard for the family and leaves no safety net of support. When you move every 2-4 years, making friends that will be there when you have an emergency or just need a break, gets hard. Your support network is often left behind at the last base. So much of the move is spent focusing on living in an area with good schools, getting therapies set up and worrying about making things routine in the mix of chaos. And sadly, most military bases are not stationed in great locations with the resources to support kids on the spectrum.

It is an issue I think our government and nation need to take seriously. Not just because it affects me. While at Edwards we had 3 kids in our TPS class diagnosed on the spectrum. Another has developmental issues. Two in the class above us and countless others I met while there and since moving. A large enough number that it often makes me think. In fact, if I could up all the people I know with kids on the spectrum, I would dare say there are more that are military affiliated than not. It is a large number considering such a small part of our population is in the military.

So, I simply put this out there not to be preachy, just to open up the opportunity for discussion and possibility. One day I hope this won't be a topic that hits home to as many Americans, but until it is, I think we owe it to ourselves, the families and most of all children who are living with this every day to do something. If you do nothing else, simply open your mind and educate yourself to what Autism is. Reality is, it is everywhere around us and unless you are living in a bubble, you will come into contact with someone who has it if you already have not.

Busy...

I don't think I stopped going today...it was busy! Erin had school at 9 and Zach had a re-evaluation with his occupational therapist at 9:30, so he stayed home in the AM and took Erin to school with me...He loved that. He got to see his teacher from the summer who was super nice to him. Shocked both Zach and i because the last day with her was a bit cold this summer. He was so excited to see Erin's room and send her on her way. We then went to his appointment. He apparently did very well. Improved on a lot of skills, but some he still can't master, even do. But, the great thing about it was that he tried. Everything his therapist asked him to do today, he tried. She said he didn't get frustrated or cry once. He didn't complain, he tried it all. That is huge progress for him and I couldn't be more proud of him. She gave me some great ideas for the types of things I can do at home with him too. She also gave me some advice for going into his next ARD at the school and fighting for OT, so we will see how that goes. All in all, I was happy with the results and we might be adding another OT session into his schedule to work on some of his sensory issues.

Took him back to school and got a chance to chat with his teacher while he was at recess. She surprised me with having a lot of positives. Her communication logs home are usually pretty descriptive of his behavior issues. So it was nice for me to hear the good. She said his behavior is a ton better and she only has to redirect him one time and he goes back on task. She is a very strict teacher and just what he needed I think. She said his wiggly stuff is the biggest issue and that is what we are hoping OT will help. She said she has found ways to help, but would love see that improve in time too...but she does understand that is an area he really can't control or help as easily. She said academically he was doing great and she plans to retest him for gifted. Apparently she tested him last year, but the school never told her he was special ed. She said she would have preferred to know so she could make sure he was in a less distracted environment and will request that he gets that in the ARD. I was so excited to hear that. His scores in Math and Reading were up in the next grade level, so all of that is great news. She said he is doing really well with the other kids and overall a great little boy. So nice to hear from someone that I couldn't read well at all.

I then went home to make some phone calls, do laundry and then off to get Erin. She had a good day, but no nap. We then got home, had about 3o minutes for her to snack, unwind and go get Zach...off to a play date with our neighbor who has a Kindergartner at Zach's school and she has a 2.5 year old girl. We played there for a few hours and came home to do dinner, bath, bed...

I am beat. Long, but good day. I am so proud of Zach. He did a great job today and is just working so hard in so many areas. I am so happy for him. So busy day, but very good one.

I am off to bed...tomorrow I get to do my weekly volunteer time at his school while Erin is at school. :)

Happy...

I am usually one to say that I feel content. I am not really a glass half full or half empty kind of person. Some days it is smashed on the floor in pieces and some days, it is overflowing. It really depends. But most days, I am content. I like content. It is safe. I don't expect too much and I am never disappointed. I am a pretty honest person. I will tell you when i am upset or mad and if you really know me, I don't have to tell you, you will know. I am much more sensitive than people think and I have to often step back and realize that not everyone else sees things through my eyes. I struggle with that a bit. Getting my feelings hurt easily. Even here in San Antonio where I am happy and have made a lot of friends, I find myself still feeling left out at times. Wondering if these are great life long friends or just for this assignment friends. Simply acquaintances. I wonder if the days of having a best friend are over. Like the best friend that lives near you and you can see all the time. Because I was lucky enough to have that and I miss that. Not that those ladies are no longer people I consider best friends, but distance changes things...how can it not. You move, you have kids, you are busy. It happens to all of us even when we don't move around every few years. Life gets busier and our friendships often are on the back burner when it is someone we don't see often. I hate that. I miss having girlfriends that know me and get me, right here. I miss being able to hang out with my friends whenever I want. I know I have been so lucky and blessed to have made some of the most amazing friends and I continue to cherish each of you...but I miss you. I wish you lived closer...I wish I didn't have to wait for spontaneous visits to Arizona or driving across the US to have a quick visit. Or hoping for trips to be able to see you. I wish you all lived closer...miss my friends...I am grateful for the new friends I am making and hopeful that the BF thing isn't behind me.

I am working on letting myself move past content and dare I say be happy. Making time for me. I have gotten more involved things, I do know a lot of people and try to go out and be involved each chance I get. I am working on taking time to do things for me, like my walks. It feels good.

But, I have to admit...There are two things in my life that have never made me simply content. I feel very blessed that even though there are days I miss my closest friends, my family and I muddle thru working to be content...these faces always give me a boost too happy. So for that I will be grateful and enjoy. They are getting so big so fast. I wish I could freeze them in time. I would give anything to make these years last longer.

They equal happy to me...

Zachary and the Piano...

This is Zachary at his 3rd piano lesson. We did not have a piano at home for him to practice on at the time this was taken, so he had really only been on the piano two times for 30 minutes a piece before this. He is loving the piano and we are so very proud of him. His face lights up as he plays...I think this was a good fit for him. Enjoy the video of our little Mozart!

Erin riding her bike...finally!

We all went out tonight to ride bikes...well all minus Brandon who doesn't have a bike yet. I brought my new bike and both kids had their bikes. I was so excited when I saw Erin finally start to peddle. It was great. I can't wait until we can all go for bike rides together. I haven't ridden a bike in over 15 years, if not more...I used to ride a lot when I was younger and loved it. I am so excited to have one again and hoping that we can all start making this part of our fun family time. Yeah for Big Erin on her bike!

A little break...

Some might have noticed I have taken a bit of a break on my blog. Not really intentional, but I suppose it was a little bit. I just had a lot on my mind that I didn't want to share and didn't feel like blogging about nothing...

Long story short, I had a lot of Dr. appointments to figure out my ongoing ear issue and it was a lot to worry about, think about, etc. On top of that Zach has had some behavior struggles at school that are emotionally draining to put it mildly. I try my best to stay positive...I try to always be fair and kind when talking about my children on here and to never make anyone think I feel more love or affection for one than the other. I know that often it is hard thru the medium of facebook, blogging, email to get the real view of what someone is thinking, so I never want to give the wrong impression. I worry if I complain on here, people will assume that I think Zachary is difficult. I never want anyone, especially him to think that.

Reality is, being his mom is hard work. It is a job I am honored to have, but it is difficult, challenging and keeps me constantly on my toes with new things popping up just as I have figured out the last problem. I want to be able to share and vent on here, but I want to be clear. Sharing and venting are simply a way to give you insight, not to complain about my son or demean him. I adore Zach and Erin, but on some days they both can drive me bananas. :)

So....Zach has had some struggles and we continue to work hard to make changes, adjustments, etc. I was so proud of him yesterday when the eye of the tropical storm Hermine went right over us, he stayed on green at school and was able to focus on school. So proud of him. He missed piano tonight because his teacher was sick. He is so far enjoying his piano classes a lot and I am so happy for him. He likes his teacher, his class and seems to be doing well overall back in school.

Erin started both of her schools this week. She went to Bracken yesterday...same school they both went to this summer. She is there from 9-2, so she naps and eats lunch there. I like the school and so far she seems happy, but she did cry when I left...It was hard to see and I hated for her to feel so sad and cling to me. But she pulled through and hopefully tomorrow drop off will be less painful for her and I. Today she went to Universal City...the school I love! She walked right in and had no issues. I think the school just does things right. They bring them in the room, meaning you don't walk your child in, the teacher meets you at the door and takes them in...for Erin, that is a huge help. They then bring them out one by one at the end of the day. So great. She was all smiles going in and coming out. I know two ladies who have girls in her class, and she apparently played with both today with no prompting from me, so that is fun to hear. I think she will thrive here. I do miss her a lot when she is gone, I can't lie. She is easy and fun and I am used to her company. But, I miss Zach too. I did get a lot done and hope as the days go on I get my system down and more and more things get done and become routine on those days for me.

I joined the PTA and have my first board meeting tomorrow and my first volunteering at the library starts next week...I am trying to get involved and keep busy. I am supposed to do my first scrapbook crop this Friday night...hopefully I will get to do that. I am contemplating joining the Y...right now it isn't in the budget, so I will be happy to see temps dropping and i can do my long, long walks again. I miss those and can't do them in this crazy heat!

We survived Hermine...lots of rain and wind. I will say, the wind at Edwards still packs a bigger punch than a tropical storm eye passing over my house, seriously!

That is all for now, I need to get to bed...

Meet the teacher!

Erin's new preschool...the one you remember I got up at 4 AM and waited outside to get her a spot at...yes that one....well this place is impressive and they seem to do things above and beyond. They have meet the teacher....one on one for 15 minutes at a designated time for your child the week before school starts. Erin was so excited to meet her new teacher and looked so pretty...I think she is really going to love school this year and love this school specifically. I am pretty happy too that she gets to go to a school I am so excited about. I loved Zach's school in Palmdale and now she will be at a place I think as highly about...makes me feel good to see her doing some special things.

What teacher wouldn't love to have this face in her class?

Little Helper...

I will admit she isn't the most effective duster, but certainly the cutest...

We did a whole lot of cleaning this weekend, cleaning the house, cleaning out and still much more to do. I feel cluttered. I feel unorganized. I feel like we have too much stuff we don't use or need. So my mission as soon as the kids get back to school is to really weed thru more things and get myself feeling like things we have are useful and functional...if not, we can let them go...In the mean time, I will enjoy and savor all the moments of "help" I get out of this little rascal.

Girls Night Out...

Well it was supposed to be Bunko night, but plans changed and we chose to just do a girls night out...It was a lot of fun! After a long and somewhat stressful first week of Zach being back at school, I needed a night out with some friends. I am blessed to have found some great friends here and women that are just a lot of fun. We went to Chuy's...my favorite Mexican Food restaurant here and enjoyed Happy Hour, dinner and lots of chatting. Then on to a "bar" out in Cibolo....totally reminded me a place in Enid and that had me laughing a bit. But it was fun and we were all kid free, husband free and had time to unwind. My sweet friend Carrie drove me, so I was able to have "fun". :) I am so thankful for great friends while living in such a great location...

Me and my friend Kristine...I met her right when we moved here last summer thru meetup.com. The playgroup we both joined was awful, but we became buddies and she started the bunko group thru which I met so many fun ladies...

Karla, myself and Natalie. All in Bunko...Karla also lives in my neighborhood, her son is in the same grade as Zach at Wiederstein and our little ones will be at the same preschool. She is PTA president at Wiederstein, so I will be spending lots of time with her soon.
Carrie, Erin and Kristine...Carrie and I are friends from the neighborhood and both kids are at Wiederstien...our little ones are the same age too...she is great. Erin knows Kristine b/c thier husbands work together (Army).
Jill, me and Karla...Jill also has her oldest at Wiederstien in Zach's grade and youngest at the school Erin will be at and on the board and in my neighborhood...Again...very lucky to have found these friends!

Adjusting...

Well we are back it, the school routine in full swing. And, as I would expect, but never look forward to, we are having some adjustment issues. Getting up, getting going, lunches packed, dressed, fed and out the door on time, well it is a work in progress. He is much better than last year, so I won't complain too much on that front. Getting used to the long days back in school I think is harder on him than he knows and he isn't realizing he needs his sleep. He is fighting us on bed time...going to bed, but we find him awake in his room later...several times last night! He is starting coming down in the middle of the night, saying he can't sleep, or had a nightmare, etc. It is not fun and I am not enjoying it. I don't want to ignore him if they are true problems, but I also know my son and know he is smart and knows how to manipulate....I am torn. He is definitely showing some attitude and behaviors that I can only attribute to the new adjustments in his life. I am hopeful that we can curb them and in the mean time I am trying to breathe...

Erin is sad each day when her brother and dad leave and I know it will be a while before she gets used to this too. She starts school on September 7th, so two weeks home with me before that fun day...I am excited for her. I like both of her schools a lot. T/Th she will be gone 9-2 in the same school she and Zach attended this summer...I think it will be a good fit for her and for me...allotting me some time to get things done I need to do and want to do. On Wed/Fri she will be at a fabulous school from 9-12 that is an accredited preschool...I spent 3 hours there yesterday cleaning the school with a bunch of the moms....how awesome that they do that for the kids and school. Cleaning the grounds, classrooms, toys, etc. She played in the room with all the other kiddos and did great. So excited to see her adapting well to new things, people and places...so much different from a year ago it is almost like night and day. I love this school and have high hopes for her there. Monday she will do dance and have time to hang out with me. :)

I agreed to be on the PTC (PTA) board at Zach's school. I heard that if you do that you can request their teacher for the next year...I like the sound of that. Plus Erin will be there next year in their preschool program and it helps me have my face there and an eye on Zach. I am definitely trying to do more, be involved and try new things.

Zach has his second night of piano tonight...he had speech/OT last night. Sadly his ABA therapist only comes once in the school year...she comes tonight, so today is jammed packed and I have already asked them to move this therapy time to another night...ugh!

I am off to the dermatologist...lots of appointments for me the next 2 weeks and hoping for some answers to things...fingers crossed.

Half way thru this long week of busy busy busy...